SHOE-GETS-SIZE SYNDROME

There is this assertion in romance circles that shoe gets size- which means that as a woman with a high taste the level I have reached demands that only man of this and that category/rank should tread my shores and any man below so and so level should never try to come closer. This ‘shoe-gets-size’ perception could emanate from adjudged level of sophistication, education, elegance, job attainment and so on.

Hence, what usually happens is that a lot of girls/ladies would never consider marriage from any person who is below that status set and kept. However, when it is God in the lead, all that illusion will disappear completely. Only God can help you choose the man who will stay, pity you and stand by you as an enduring husband. One of the greatest reasons why most girls/ladies do not ever get their desired husband is because they set (idols in their hearts) their targets so high and would only turn their eyes back if they adjudge the man who has called to be their “size”.

The question now is, “who is your marital size?” You may define that size but God whose thoughts are not our thoughts and whose ways are different from our ways will not consider what we consider (Isaiah 55:8).

   How many times have young girls/ladies rejected marriage proposals from persons they considered not up to standard only to marry devils or even marry a man who will die prematurely and leave them as widows at an early age? I have an example near me here and from there I learn many lessons. Many ladies after rejecting, rejecting, and rejecting, looking for Mr. Right, ten years later, that same lady will come to accept people who are lower in grade than men they rejected ten years ago, who of course by now have grown and “multiplied”.

   Shoe gets size. Yes! But take time with this as you consider that request from Mr. Starter. It can happen that by tomorrow that person climbs to the top of the ladder and you begin to say had I known I would have acted differently. These days, as always the young are growing!

   How many have rejected marriage proposals today only to regret tomorrow. The result is that we keep having lots of girls/ladies who are not married. But for space, I would have given you instances that some lovely ladies stuck to this theory of shoe gets size only to regret at the end.

   There was this case of a lady (graduate) working in one of the prominent companies in town earning a fat sum of money. She had been praying for a husband, and then came one day, a Christian brother who approached her for marriage. The young man left and there was a battle going on within this lady for days. She had sleepless nights with thoughts flowing in aimlessly.

Behold! There is always that Divine instinct in every person which is usually too sharp when the right thing clicks. It is either you neglect it, or kill it with the phrase, “shoe gets size”.

    Well this lady after much struggling within herself for days decided to accept this man, and marriage was consummated and consequently they were doing exceedingly well. The question once again is, “who is your marital size?”

GETTING YOUR DESIRED HUSBAND

  Sister Prisca, Lillian and Eunice had prayed fervently. They made it a point of duty to attend every prayer meeting, seminar, workshop and symposium that had to do with bachelorhood and spinsterhood. They also kept themselves holy unto the Lord, without defiling the “temple of the Lord”. They were so chaste without messing up or opening their bodies to men, except if it were in the arena of marriage.

  Three useful years had rolled by since they devoted apostolically to this mode of pursuit and yet no dice. No husband at sight, except flatterers who came around with incomprehensible gimmicks.

   A lot of women I spoke to confirmed this thing we refer to as “marital timing” in a woman’s life. That is, there is usually a time when men hovers around a woman, most of them itching to establish a good relationship so much so that the woman becomes confuse.

  Then as they keep coming, after a while they will stop coming. This is compared to a raining season when rain falls and falls, if you really have any need of water that is the time to dig under-ground reservoir and store up your water because afterwards the rain stops.

  As I went around, I also came across interesting examples like this one. A certain lady named Jessica told me about a time when seven men were coming after her. At times some of them would meet one another and each would buy drinks to entertain the other thinking that the one he met was a mere visitor not knowing that he is a paddy man coming to seek a wife out of the same Jessica. She was in a state of dilemma and did not know who to choose. Of course, at the end of the day, Jessica ended up pregnant for one married guy who used to be her friend just before she went to University. This came after the whole of these seven men who were chasing her got tired and left! Now time seemed to have passed for Jessica.

  Before I give you more examples, let us bring home our point here that there is a time when marriage is on for you. There is also a time when suddenly marriage seems to be off for you. It seems as if heaven is locked now against you.

  It is just like some women who are so fertile that they easily become pregnant at every turn of the body, all of a sudden, when they need it they discovered that it does not happen as expected.

This is a mystery, but what we can deduce from this is that for every woman there is a natural time to get married. That natural time is when the would-be husbands keep coming by their numbers. Perhaps, you should settle this marriage matter by then. For different people it comes at different times and stages in life and after that the light could be out sometimes permanently except there is a divine intervention.

  Therefore, to get your desired husband you need to observe your “marital timing” and once it comes knocking utilize that opportunity judiciously. Why would you leave grabbing something when it is surplus before you than to cry wolf when it elapse.

  Shakespeare, in Julius Caesar, said “There is a tide in the affairs of men which is taken at the flood, beads on to fortune, (but) omitted; all the voyage of their life is bound in miseries and in sorrows…” The Bible says, “To everything there is a season…” (Ecclesiastes 3:1-8). The mystery of “marital timing”, a term which simply refers to the fact that there is a time and a season when suitors (would-be husband) flow around any girl/lady and after that time, there seems to be silence is very real. The fact that most girls/ladies do not observe and dip in while this flow is on coupled with other points mentioned in this write-up form the major reasons why most women cannot get their desired husbands.

Ask any of the 90% girls today crying for a husband and she would tell you that there had been at least two or three men that came to say, “I want to marry you” But …what happened?

   If only you realize, fine girl, fine lady that you were created by God and that this same God has designed at your creation times and seasons for your life, and that this same God of purpose has designed the kinds/ types of persons who will come across you to help bring to pass the reason He created you, then you will realize that it is for you to face marriage when the “marital timing” is on for you, just when men keep on coming and flowing. If you say you would not marry yet because you are just 22, do you know whether God purposed that you will live for only 44 years? Think about that!